Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Better Than Perfect

I know they say you should sleep when your baby sleeps but I can't help but to smile and pause in gratitude when I get out of the shower and find my sweet baby boy and husband all snuggled in bed fast asleep meanwhile the movie they started plays in the background... Yet from all their exhaustion they only watched about 10 minutes. I smile when I go to put Keller in his bassinet and they both snuggle closer together as if to subconsciously tell me they are comfortable and don't want to be budged at all. I smile knowing how much this daddy loves his little boy and how much he misses him everyday! I smile knowing that this daddy is my incredible husband, a man who works hard to support our little family all day and then comes home wanting so badly to snuggle but has endless hours of studying and schoolwork. However even with his heavy workload he still manages to find time for me and Keller! He still spoils us with hugs and kisses! He shows us unconditional love he sacrifices his time, money, and even sleep! He doesn't hesitate to wake up and snuggle for those late nights. Even though he can't "feed" the baby he wakes up with us anyways just to snuggle and talk. He changes diapers even though it's not his “favorite” thing! He cleans up spit up and tells great stories of skiing and future adventures! He is my husband, my best friend, and my eternal companion! Even though we are still adjusting and are exhausted more often than not, we are happier than ever! I love my sweetheart more now then I could have ever imagined! I can't believe how blessed I am to have my boys! I love my little Keller bug and kurt more than anything! I smile as I walk in and see them snuggling and with everything running through my mind, I know that I have it all! I smile not because life is perfect but because it is a life of happiness a life of learning a life of fun a life of love and most of all a life I get to live, love, and enjoy as we try our best to be perfect... Knowing its nearly impossible but loving the journey. Besides I think this is far better than perfection... Exhaustion and all... This life is my own perfect little heaven on earth!!

Keller's Blessing day!!

We blessed our little Keller bug yesterday! December 2, 2012. 6 weeks old to the day and perfect as can be! It was an absolutely perfect day!!

The anticipation for this day was unreal.. I think Kurt teased me all week as I decorated for Christmas trying to get the house ready as well as searching everywhere for the perfect little blessing outfit for Keller! I wanted to get him a perfect little outfit that would be special but since I am cheap I also didn’t want to spend 50 bucks on an outfit he would only wear once.. so… after looking at numerous stores I finally put together exactly what I was looking for! I ended up getting it from Janie and Jack, and can I just say… one day I hope to be rich just so I can buy my kiddos all the cute little outfits they sell.. Their outfits are all to die for! Soo cute!! Well when I first started shopping I got very nervous because the onsie alone was 32 bucks… um really there is no way I could spend that on just a onsie.. but thank goodness for holiday sales! Woot! Woot! I ended up getting his entire outfit (onsie, pants, hat, & tie) all for a lovely $36.97- Can I tell you how much I love clearance racks! And the best part is he can totally wear it all again.. well until he grows more! Which seems to be happening a lot quicker than I would like… my baby is going to be a toddler in no time if he doesn’t slow down! Well he was dressed to impress! He looked so handsome in his little button up shirt, and suspenders! Complete with the cutest little hat… and the hat without the bowtie he looked just like a newsie! I couldn’t help it, he looked absolutely adorable and handsome in every way!!! He also had a beautiful blessing blanket that some of our family friends made for us! I love it and I will save it forever!! I think it is one we will use for all of our kiddos! It was truly humbling to wrap our sweet baby in a blanket made with so much love and kindness and we felt truly blessed to be able to use it on such a beautiful occasion as Kurt was able to give our little guy a name and a blessing.   

The morning went on without any problem and for once… we were early for church! Phew!!! It was such a great feeling to walk into the chapel and already see so many family and friends there to show their love. We are truly blessed! Right when we walked in and I saw all the familiar faces I felt nervous… not the bad kind but I was just so full of emotion suddenly I felt as though I was going to burst! As it was time for the blessing and Kurt stood with Keller I was full of so much emotion I automatically started tearing up and it only got worse as I watched our dads, grandpas, uncles, and friends. It was so amazing to see so many worthy priesthood holders and know that my sweet baby boy has so many incredible examples. Kurt was able to give our little Keller Booth Thomas his name as well as the most beautiful blessing which will stay forever in my heart! I wish so badly I could have recorded it in some way, the spirit was so strong and it was honestly such a beautiful and perfect experience. I never imagined the way that I would feel, there was something about hearing your own baby blessed that words cannot describe! I cannot even begin to express how grateful I am to be sealed for time and eternity to a worthy priesthood holder and be a mommy to the cutest little boy that there ever was! My heavenly father has blessed me with the most incredible family, I have been blessed far beyond anything I could have ever dreamed of!
As sacrament continued, the spirit grew and seemed to eat me away as I listened to each testimony and I knew I had to say something. As I stood to bear my testimony, I immediately was overcome with emotion. My love for my heavenly father and savior became so overpowering I felt as though I was going to wiggle the podium right off the stand from shaking so badly. When I finished my testimony I only hope people could understand my words through my sobs, I went to sit with my incredible family. As I sat back down after staring across the entire congregation which was packed of family and friends I felt so blessed and so overwhelmed with love. I will never understand what I did to deserve so many blessings but I am without a doubt so incredibly grateful!

After the blessing we all headed home and well to be honest I think if we would have squished one more person in our house it would have burst at the seams.. we had 70+ in our home at once! but I loved it! We had so many come out to show there love and support! The turnout was truly amazing… I honestly don’t even know how we fit everyone in our little house but  It was so great to have so many family and friends come to support our little Keller! Even though our little man seemed to sleep through his entire celebration I know he loved all the snuggles and love from everyone that was there in spirit and in person!

And then by the end of the day we were all ready for bed! Well at least me and kurt were! Haha once everyone left Keller was wide awake and ready to play! It was hilarious so we ended up snuggling and playing with our little angel till about midnight when he decided to finally fall asleep for a few hours! Needless to say it was a very long night… but it was a perfect day so it all equaled out to be great! We love our little mister so much and I am so in love with both of my boys! I can’t imagine a day without either of them!

Introducing our little Keller Booth Thomas

It has been far too long since I last posted and I know for sure that I am quite possibly the worst blogger ever but what can I say, I have been a little pre-occupied with something far better than blogging could ever be.. and that is this little man!

And.. that I have also decided is why I must blog! I want to always remember the little things! The smiles and coos, the long nights and dirty diapers, the hugs and kisses, and much much more! Life as I know it is a never ending whirlwind of adventure. It has been amazing on levels that I never would have imagined possible, and yet here I am… sitting at a computer, dark circles under my eyes, a huge smile on my face, all while snuggling a beautiful 6 week old little boy who just wants to snuggle in his moms arms instead of sleeping in his crib… and well to be honest, that is how I like it!
Well to start from the beginning, 6 weeks ago on Sunday the 21st of October Kurt and I woke up after waiting and hearing that our little man could arrive “any day”… well after hearing that for 4 weeks and seeing nothing, this October morning seemed no different… that is until after sacrament meeting. During sacrament I was uncomfortable… nothing too extreme but I just couldn’t seem to sit still so we headed home and after awhile I fell fast asleep!   I woke up an hour later with that same discomfort.. I jokingly turned to kurt and said “ha wouldn’t that be awesome if this was labor! It doesn’t even hurt!” well I spoke too soon.. While laying down I had a sudden stomach pain and thought I had  to go to the bathroom… TMI, I know.. sorry! But no luck, I was suddenly very uncomfortable. Well after this pain went on for a few minutes Kurt decided to time them and said that they were probably contractions… I told him there was no way and then decided to try and paint my nails while sitting there stuck in the bathroom, haha oh I didn’t have any luck with that because that is when the pain got unbearable.. to the point I didn’t think I could get off the toilet. Kurt timed them again and they were less than 3 minutes apart! Whoops.. I should have listened to my sweet and smart hubby sooner because When the contractions came, they came with a vengeance! Haha Well our adventure began and we headed to the hospital… I feel bad for every car we passed because I know for a fact that I looked like death as I was withering in pain in the front seat! We arrived at Riverton hospital just after 6pm and once at the hospital they took us right back , checked  me and let me know that I was only at a 4.. which didn’t sound too exciting to me since I was at a 3 for weeks! And then they told me that since it was our first, I would probably be in labor for a good 12-16 hours, which sounded like the death of me.   
They through in an IV that helped a little with the pain but I was still feeling the contractions like crazy so the nurse came back in after only 10 minutes and checked again.. and to our surprise and excitement, I was already at an 8! EEK!! They quickly called the anesthesiologist to get me an epidural and called the doc because I was ready to push! After I was relaxed and the doctor arrived I was good and ready to go! I started pushing around 730pm and our little man arrived at 953pm…. I will spare you all the details about me and pushing but I am happy to say it was a truly incredible experience and nothing like the movies... if anything I was laughing and unsure if I was doing it right... that is only because of the epidural they gave me before and once I was given the epidural it was pain free ... amazing!!! but truthfully I do not know how people do it natuarlly... that was always my plan, until I actually felt the pain and then I was begging for the drugs right as we walked in the hospital doors! they were AMAZING!!!
However the most amazing part of all was our little baby! Seeing Dr. Hansen lift up our sweet baby boy and laying him on my chest was the most incredible experience in the world. Words cannot describe the feelings that were in the room nor the happiness for that matter! Everything else at that very second seemed to fade away. It was just me, my eternal sweetheart, and our perfect baby boy. It is so funny because almost instantly it seemed that the 3 of us had always been and just fit so perfectly. I couldn’t have asked for a better pregnancy or outcome! That night Kurt and I stayed wide awake just in awe at the thought that we were now officially parents! The three of us all squished together on the hospital bed and in no better way to describe it… just soaked it all in! Snuggling, smiling, and just loving every minute! It was truly a dream come true.

Now fast forward 6 weeks and here we are… I never imagined that I would have such a perfect little blonde haired blued eyed child! But I love every bit of him! I wish I could record his every movement, every sound, and every perfect little adorable face expression! I can’t believe how quickly he has already seemed to grow and how fast he is changing! It is absolutely terrifying to think that my baby will one day grow up! I have no doubt that my love for him will just continue to grow but I in this moment want nothing more than to remember every little stage and grin! I love my little angel and cant imagine a day without him!